If you had a chance to somehow go back in time and talk to your younger teenage self…what would you say?

One of things that’s been happening with me during this pandemic is well…quite a bit of introspection. I’ve had a few distanced meals outdoors with softball teammates but it’s still been mostly a secluded bubble with my hubby and dog. My brain has really been picking up the slack. The dreams have been more surreal than usual. The guest stars have been everybody in my past and present and the backdrops have been beautiful or scary and anything in between.

In one dream, I run into my teenage self and am absolutely unloading all this information in a rant that the average Joe couldn’t understand. I laugh at one point and ask: "did you understand any of that?" The kid shakes his head; "no."

I wake up thinking about the things I can do to help that younger me. I think I would encourage him to be happy and take some chances sooner than later. I had a lot of guilt growing up. The time I spent in the closet, I can’t get back. What was I even afraid of? People will either like you or they will not. If they disown you, turn the page and you be you.

Actually, I know what I would say to that kid: you’ve got to make your own way.

My right shoulder has been bothering me for a week. I’m not 100% sure how this happened, as I awoke last Thursday with the pain. I’ve been icing and hitting the ibuprofen like it’s candy.

The injury itself seems to be located at the top of the shoulder but different arm angles have varying degrees of discomfort. Strangely enough, lifting something doesn’t bother it (although I’m really taking it easy in that department) but extending and stretching is an ouch. If I were to take my right hand and move it to my left shoulder, I would really feel the burn.

I had to cancel softball practice with the guys last Sunday, which is a major bummer. I look forward to it on the weekends. The guys don’t seem to organize without me or my teammate Don (the elder statesmen of the group) and he’s out of town. I mean I also happen to be the guy with the balls and bases so I think need to get someone to step up and be the lead person, while I mend.

Is there a silver lining? Yes, it didn’t happen during a softball season.

The telephone operator was very friendly, as she set up my new phone line. I was in Jay’s apartment, calling from his landline. The conversation wasn’t unfamiliar. This was my third apartment in New York City.

"Do you want me to give you whatever comes up?"

"Yes, please, " I said, not wanting to pay for anything that spelled out anything like 870-TOOL.

A brief moment passed and she said, "Wow, you’ve got the last one."

"The last number," I laughed.

"You’ve got the last Murray Hill Exchange."

I didn’t think much of it at the time or for that matter during my time in the Murray Hill section of Manhattan (spoiler alert: it’s not much of a hill). I wrote the number down and memorized it. The fact that it was an exchange number made it easier to remember. The first 3 digits were your neighborhood. MU9 was Murray Hill.

Back in the land and time before the smartphone, we memorized and remembered more because we had to I guess.

Anyway, when I was given the last Murray Hill Extension for a phone number, it was, as it turns out, a precursor to change. New York City was doling out more cell phone numbers than ever. Everybody was carrying a flip phone, a little Nokia thing, or whatever that personal planner phone with the tiny buttons was called.

At the time, it never occurred to me that we might actually cut the Ma Bell cord and go cellphone solo or as I did it when I first moved to SF… smartphone only. I was sharing an apartment at the time. It worked.

Today the smartphone is an extension of one’s arm. The world has changed and when you were raised in the pre-tech existence then you really take notice of the differences you see. You know, the car accidents caused by texting or the folks walking down the street and looking straight down into their personal black mirror. My fave is when folks go out to socialize and spend half the time checking their screen. They can’t all be doctors on call.

The above is not a rant or even a complaint. It’s an observation from someone who has watched the change go down over time. I have a smartphone and I use it. I also make a point of putting it away, when I’m doing something. I don’t bring it to the dinner table. Heck, I make sure it’s not even visible when I’m talking to someone.

Why bother? That young man moving into that apartment had the right social habits down before the tech stuff, there was no reason to change anything. If Batman leaves his utility belt at home, he doesn’t need to drive all the way back to the batcave, he still is quite capable.

We continue along 2020 semi-sheltering and getting some physical exercise here and there. Temperatures continue to spike in the SF Bay Area. Three months in a row, we’ve had little heat waves (4 to 5-day stretch). We’re currently in the middle of one right now. It should be over Sunday.

It’s over 90 degrees in San Francisco today.

It’s tougher to continue to eat light on warmer days when all you really want is to bathe in ice-cream. It’s a balance. When it’s not too hot we can get out there and hike with our precocious pitbull. We did a late day hike at Milagro Ridge, a few days ago. It wasn’t a hardcore hike but I think it prevented us from permanently melding into our reclining chairs.

We’re probably watching more streaming shows than ever, Netflix isn’t hurting. On the plus side, I’ve almost caught up with everything I was interested in watching. The funny thing is the more I watch, the more I can spot crappy TV writing quickly. We generally don’t give shows a whole lot of time to get things going. If you don’t get me early, you lose me. Sure, if I’m watching a British period piece then..sure, I accept ahead of time that you slowly build your world first before there is a confrontational line like: "Reginald you cad!"

It’s high viewership time and there is a load of junk to sift through, even still you can find worthwhile things. Garry and my tastes are not identical, I’m probably a little more patient with a show but when it clicks for both of us it’s cool. And there are times when we don’t agree and either I go off on my own to see the rest of it or he does. The streaming stuff, like the ice cream, we try not to over-indulge but it helps for me to shut out another contentious election year. I feel I can say that because I voted. 🙂