Naming names

When we were getting married, the conversation about our chosen last name was short. I had to recount my reasoning to a family member who had an opinion. There are no villains in this story. It’s excellent that Garry has a healthy relationship with his family (not all, like me).

The chat was: Hey, what do you want to do about this? Nothing? Yeah, same here. Truth be told, he thought about it more than I did. The man has a last name of 11 letters that need to be spelled to a customer service person over the phone each time. Our union certainly gave him an out, a hubby with a five-letter last name. What’s not to love?

As the story goes, the family member with the strong opinion impressed upon him to keep his name. In my corner, there was my brother, who did not understand why anyone would get married, so there were definitely no opinions coming there. One might assume that my disconnection with my biological folks may have pushed me to a decision to change it. No, at the end of the day, I didn’t see a reason to change it.

I was happy to have the choice. Names are given to you at birth; you don’t have a choice. Marriages do give you an opportunity to “move the furniture.”

I kept Plaza, and we did not hyphenate anything. It felt right, as we are both independent guys who are together.

Ah, but the tennis match: “Why aren’t you taking his name? “ She said.

“I really don’t see a point in it, “ I return.

“That’s a shame. Why don’t you want to?”

I thought about missing out on the absolute fun of changing all my cards, my driver’s license, etc., but I didn’t see a benefit to it. It wouldn’t give me magical powers or anything.”

Ultimately, she wasn’t satisfied with my answers. We’re both New Yorkers and could go on about the same thing, but what is the point? It’s like two pit bulls you introduce on top of a bed of roses. They’ll go at it and will come out alright, but those roses will be red confetti. Also, I came into this with an ace up my sleeve. She never took her husband’s last name when they got married.

After another question was posed, I gently inserted that ace into the discussion. “Look, you may want to sit this one out, “ I suggested. She wasn’t expecting that serve. The quiet that found us was cautious but warm.

40 love.